Can I play therapist for a moment?

When you bring it up, is it always in the heat of the moment? Are you just asking for it and waiting for their answer? Or have you tried just talking to them about it and finding out what it is that makes them uncomfortable and what you can do to make them more comfortable with it.

I totally had this conversation with my ex regarding his wife. She hates it.....but slowly she is coming around to being ok with it because he is patient with her and she knows that it is not just something he is begging for, but something that is really awesome for him. He was the one who taught me and I just had to remind him how he took it slowly and step by step with me.